


Change My Name

by storm_dog_pirate



Category: Nikolai Series - Leigh Bardugo, The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: F/M, Pirate AU, Underwater Kiss, a bit steamy maybe HAHKLAJSDF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-06
Updated: 2020-11-06
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:20:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27415630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/storm_dog_pirate/pseuds/storm_dog_pirate
Summary: Nikolai's afternoon alone with Zoya had taken quite a turn when their suppressed feelings only seem to intensify as they can be themselves rather than a captain and a prince.
Relationships: Nikolai Lantsov/Zoya Nazyalensky
Kudos: 21





	Change My Name

**Author's Note:**

> Nikolai’s POV for @wafflesandkruge's fic queen of the tides; king of the country. Pls go read that, it slaps. 🥺❤️

Nikolai had always prided himself as a gentleman. Especially growing up in the palace, even as the second prince—or the bastard, according to his older brother—he really had to learn the manners a royal ought to have.

So when he tried to offer his help in rowing the boat and got rejected, it did prick at his pride dramatically. But he decided not to complain further as he wouldn’t be exhausted in guiding them to saints-know-where Zoya was planning to take them. 

“Where are we going?” Nikolai asked, not wanting to sound so eager, but failing. He fixed the hat that she had put earlier on his head, but it only slid back down to the side as the boat swayed along with the waves. 

It was the first time he was alone with the captain, and his mind was half-thinking of ways he could capture the infamous Zoya Nazyalensky and half-panicking that he was  _ alone _ with her. The latter thought was rather unfitting for his true intention of letting himself be taken hostage, but the distraction in the form of the woman in front of him was making it difficult for him to focus. Those two weeks with her on the ship had made him stray from what he was supposed to do. 

And yet he found himself not minding one bit.

Zoya glared at him. “None of your business,” she said curtly, just as he had expected.

Nikolai bit back a laugh and shrugged, leaning off to the side to look at the waters instead. But doing so only reminded him of the color of her eyes. He shoved away the thought. Not the best time to be thinking about her when he had a much bigger thing to prioritize. 

Perhaps he should just jump into water and try to escape, or take off with the boat once Zoya was distracted enough once they finally landed. 

Both sounded idiotic, but they were the only ideas he could think of.

Or maybe he should just tag along with it, see where it would go, and he found it dangerously tempting.

Soon enough, they arrived at their destination, a cove surrounded with high rock walls, the beach completely secluded and hidden from plain sight unless one sailed their way there or they somehow landed on the cliffs above. Nikolai raised an eyebrow as he eyed the surroundings. 

Had Zoya brought him here to dispose of him?

But when she only flopped down on the sand after they secured the boat, his mind went to utter confusion. She couldn’t have possibly trusted him enough to let him leave her sight or even be around her for more than a few minutes. Though looking at her now, with her eyes closed and at ease, he realized that she didn’t mind having him there.

Nikolai couldn't help a smile on his lips, and it wasn't because of the triumph of having the captain to finally trust him even for a bit. She had agreed to let him out of the ship when he requested it, sure enough it was a small step towards gaining her full trust. Not that he needed anything as worthless as a pirate's trust, but he still found himself trying. 

It got him thinking, what satisfaction would it bring him if he ever was successful in gaining her trust, only to crush it after? Two weeks ago, he wouldn't have minded. It was appalling that for a short time, he had let his emotions get the best of him again, and it was him that was getting reeled in instead of her. 

He chose to run around the beach for a while, trying to find his way to escape. Or so he thought he was doing. He covered up for his scheming by occasionally calling out to her about the things he was able to find around. At the far end of the beach there was a small cave in the corner of the cliff wall, and he made his way towards it. 

The cove was big enough to fit a crouching person inside, but the space was already occupied with a half-buried chest in the sand. Nikolai frowned as he approached the small casket that bore the Liliyana's crest. 

He raised an eyebrow, looking back over his shoulder to where Zoya was. Was the beach her secret place? Curiosity got the best of him and then he was opening the chest. 

Various metal objects filled the box, mostly coins and tarnished jewelry, but what captured his eyes was the blunt dagger on top of the pile. He examined the weapon, taking note of the messy carvings in its hilt, the jagged edges of  _ Zoya _ barely visible on the worn out surface. 

A smile appeared on his lips as he pictured a little, grumpy Zoya wielding the dagger as if it were a sword. 

He put the weapon back in the chest and closed it, but not before snatching some of the cheap jewelry that he could use later. 

Nikolai got out of the small cave, wandering aimlessly to find any escape routes again. 

There wasn't really anywhere to go unless he took the boat they'd used and left her here. 

It was the most rational means to run off, but he found that it didn't sit well with him. 

All because his actual mission actually involved capturing her, not leaving her behind where he would have to chase her all over again. 

Nikolai eventually resigned that he was stuck there in the cove with Zoya, so he came back to the spot where she was before, and found that she was still lying down with her eyes closed.

His heart did a strange flip at the sight. She looked calm and peaceful, so unlike the usual stoic demeanor she had whenever she was commanding her ship.

She was nothing like the stories he'd heard passed around in port towns.

_ Zoya Nazyalensky is a witch. Has to be, with the way she keeps slipping the authorities. _

_ Nazyalensky is a cruel woman. Heard she once had a man killed for looking at her funny. _

At first, he didn't have a hard time believing them.  _ The Stormwitch _ , they called her,  _ the terror of the seas. _ And when he was given the opportunity to try and capture her, he was beyond determined to take whatever titles she had earned for herself and drown them in the seas that she claimed as her territory.

But looking at her now, after spending two whole weeks with her and trying to find the same drive he once had to capture her, Nikolai realized it wasn't as strong as before. He might have even said that he couldn't find the reason to. 

The Zoya he'd come to know was fierce, yes. Fiercely loyal and protective. Unwavering to her goal that always involved the greater good. But never cruel.

For once, he didn't know if he had the heart to accomplish his actual objective anymore.

Nikolai slumped down onto the sand beside her. "So," he started, trying to take advantage of the easy air around them, "this is your beach?"

A ghost of a smile twitched on her lips. "Correct," she said. "I'm Queen Zoya of the Driftwood and Tides. You may address me as Your Majesty."

He huffed a laugh. It was so unlike her to humor him with that kind of answer. Something was really different with her today, and he figured he didn't want whatever it was to go away just yet.

Impulsively, he took her hand and pressed a chaste kiss to the back of it. "It is truly the honor of my lifetime to meet you, then, Your Majesty," he said, and he realized that there was a slight truth to his words.

Zoya snatched her hand back as if she were burned, but the redness in her cheeks didn't escape his eyes. "Isn't touching royalty without their permission punishable by death?"

"Oh, yes," he said, laying beside her and propping his head up with a fist. He looked at her with a teasing gleam in his eyes. "A very painful one. But I can’t even begin to imagine what they’d do to someone who kidnaps a prince and brings him to a secret pirate hideaway.”

She looked back up to the sky and closed her eyes again. "Only if that bastard Sturmhond catches me," Zoya grumbled, and Nikolai visibly swallowed. Had she not closed her eyes, he knew she would've seen through the change of his demeanor and demanded him to tell what he knew. "He's been unsuccessful for years. And as far as I'm concerned, he can die trying."

Nikolai covered up his uneasiness with a loud sneeze, and he saw her eyebrows furrow slightly but she didn't open her eyes. There had been far too many close calls in the ship before, with her gaze becoming more and more wary of Tamar every time the latter was talking to him. 

He could only hope that Zoya would catch on with them.

Amidst the growing panic in his mind, an idea popped into his head.

"Stay here." Then he was scrambling to his feet.

"How dare you order a royalty around?" He heard her call out, but there wasn't the usual venom in her tone. A smile twitched on his lips. He needed to do something to distract him from the weight of her previous words to him, so he figured he might do a little surprise.

Besides, Nikolai didn't know how long before the truth came to crash between them and drive them apart.

He had time for now.

***

The damned chains finally clicked after several slips from his fingers, and he smiled triumphantly. It looked good, to him at least, and he held it close to his eyes to appreciate it. He could only hope that she would too. 

Nikolai felt her presence before she spoke. 

"What are you doing?" Her voice came from somewhere near behind him, and he immediately jumped to his feet. 

"Stop!" he said, holding his arms up as if to hide what he was doing. He knew he looked a bit petty with his attempt, and he felt his ears go hot. "It's a surprise. Turn around." 

Her scowl didn't waver as she crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow at him. She obviously didn't want to be ordered around. 

Nikolai sighed. "If I was going to murder you, Zoya dear, I would have slit your throat while you slept," he said, but his words were nothing but a hollow joke. "Lesser chance of you fighting back and damaging my pretty face." 

The stubborn expression was still there. "Maybe you like your victims to suffer." 

"Trust me," he said, his tone holding enough sincerity that surprised him as well. He blinked. Everything was really coming to backfire at him. 

Another moment passed before Zoya finally complied and turned, an exasperated sigh coming out from her lips. Nikolai smiled as he picked up the small crowns and made his way to her. 

Her posture was stiff and alert all the while he was approaching her, and he had to stifle a laugh at her reaction. The great captain of the Liliyana fearing for her life? Very unheard of. He decided to mess with her for a bit. 

He stopped right behind her, and the scent of wildflowers immediately invaded his nose. He tried not to breathe in more of her as he brought his free hand to her shoulder. As he had expected, she jumped back from his touch. 

Nikolai chuckled. "A bit of a high-strung, aren't you?" he said, voice laced with amusement. He started to guide her to the ocean, but he felt her resistance and her attempt to pull away. "We need the water for this to work." 

"For what to work?" she demanded. The water was already up to their chests, and she was beginning to struggle a bit more. "Are you drowning me like an unwanted kitten?" 

"Nothing of that sort. Close your eyes." 

She turned around to protest, her blue eyes sharp and wary at the same time. "Nik—" 

"I'm waiting."

Zoya stared back at him incredulously. Nikolai knew she was contemplating whether to strangle him or stab him, and yet he didn't seem to be fazed and he continued to look at her with an expectant expression. 

With another exasperated sigh, she shook her head before finally closing her eyes. 

He brought his hand that was hiding the crowns from his back, and gently placed one on her head. It had taken him a few hours to mend the thing, letting his love for putting things together drive him to work carefully. He even went as far as going through her things while she was asleep to add the small gems.

But when he looked at her now, with her eyes closed and the gilded crown practically glowing on her head, Nikolai didn’t know if there was anything more beautiful than the sight he was seeing right now. 

"Alright," he said, his voice coming out more breathless than he intended, "you can look now."

Zoya opened her eyes. He held his breath as she looked at her reflection in the waters. For a moment, he thought that she considered it petty and childish, and he was ready to brush it off as a mere joke to save his dignity. But when Nikolai saw the vibrant warmth in her eyes, he realized that he'd do anything to see it all over again. 

It was then that a single thought struck him, the one that came to his mind the first time he saw her, but never really pondered about it until now. He sucked in a breath as if he had just been punched in the gut. 

She was beautiful. 

_ Saints, she was so beautiful _ . 

He slipped a crown of his own just as she looked up at him, and he cleared his throat, trying to remember the tone used in statements during a coronation. 

"I crown thee, Zoya Nazyalensky, first of her name, Queen of the Driftwood and Tides, Head of the Cove, Protector of the Seas, Lady of the Sands," he said, each made-up name bringing amusement to her eyes. He found himself smiling softly at the triumph of making the great Captain Nazyalensky amused rather than annoyed with him. He fixed the crown on her head, letting his hand linger for another moment. "Long live the Queen." 

She raised an eyebrow at him. "If I'm Queen, then what does that make you?" 

Nikolai flourished a hand in the air. "Why, your loyal king consort, of course." 

The weather and the waters weren't that cold, but the redness on her cheeks were apparent. "And Prince of Ravka," she said. 

" _ Second _ Prince," he corrected. "Big difference. And I must say, these crowns I made are much more comfortable than the ones they made me wear back in Ravka." 

"Is that so?"

He fought a wince as he tried not to remember the feeling. "It's horrible," he said, wrinkling his nose. Zoya was frowning, expression curious as if urging him to go on. She didn’t break her gaze at him, unwavering, and he was floored from the intensity of her eyes. 

_ Beautiful. _

And it was in that moment that his mind narrowed down to a single thought. Nikolai  _ wanted _ to kiss her.

He knew what he had to do. With a dramatic expression, he added, "After wearing one all day, you develop a horrible ache right" —his hand moved to cup the back of her neck and pulled her closer— "here." 

It had been his intention to pull her in, to be nearer to her, and yet every word still seemed to fly out of his mind with their closeness. The current had pushed them nearer to each other, their bodies touching, a situation they never would have dared to be in back on the ship. 

There wasn't much space between them, with their chests flush against each other and Zoya had to tilt her head up to look at him. Up close, he noticed that her eyes were of the shade not much different from the seas, and maybe that was why he always felt drawn to them, as they were near the same thing he adored so much. 

He suddenly found it hard to breathe. 

_ Beautiful _ . 

The lapping waves around them weren't enough to overcome the sound of the erratic beats of his heart nor the voice telling him to close the distance between them. 

_ The seas will help you find your way.  _

It was something his mentor always liked to say. He almost smiled at the memory; he had never quite believed it back then, as he would say that it was the sailors alone that found their way back. 

But now, he didn't think so. 

Because the seas helped him find his way and it led him to  _ her _ . 

A stronger current pushed them closer together, and then it was followed by a wave that sent them underwater. 

Below the surface, everything was calm and quiet, the feeling of serenity almost strange to him after all the harshness both the seas and the palace had thrown at him. Nikolai looked over at Zoya; her hair was cascading around her like a glowing halo, and if she were a saint, he knew he would get down on his knees and worship her. 

His hand was still on the back of her neck, and his free hand slowly came up to cup her cheek. His gaze on her was soft, baring his soul before the storm that took his breath away. 

_ Beautiful _ . 

Nikolai didn't know who moved first, whether it was him or her, or even both, it didn't matter. The moment his lips met hers, he already knew it was over. 

He needed her more than air, the taste of her mouth making him feel alive as he felt her hands threading into his hair and his back to kiss him deeper. It would've been enough for him, but the current dragged them up to the surface. 

Zoya only had a second to breathe before he was cupping her face with both hands and pulling him to her, and she was meeting him halfway. They tangled again in a mess of eager hands and urgent mouths, neither of them wanting to end the moment. 

It was easy to forget everything he was supposed to do, the actual reason why he was here in the first place, but the sighs coming from her mouth made his thoughts slip away and only focus on the feel of her. 

Nikolai smoothed her hair back, his lips moving from her mouth to her jaw, and to the spot under her ear. Her hands clutched on his back, and then she was tilting her head back for him. He tightened his grip on her waist as he moved dangerously down from her ear to the spot where her neck met her shoulder, feeling a shiver run through her when he lightly bit down on her skin. He  _ couldn't _ get enough. 

A sharp gasp came from her mouth, her other hand coming up to tangle in his hair. "Nikolai," Zoya breathed, turning his head to capture his lips, and Nikolai fell to her again. 

Whether it was minutes or hours that they were tangled in each other's arms, they didn't know. But eventually they figured they still needed to get back to the ship, and as much as they wanted to get lost with each other for a longer time, they had to swim back to the shore, and back to their small boat. 

They lay exhausted on the sand right after, both of them trying to catch their breaths before they make their way back to the ship, and back to their reality. 

Along with the truth of who Nikolai really was. 

"So…" he started, but he was cut off by her voice right away. 

"Not—not now." Her tone was begging, almost desperate, very far from the voice that always held sharpness and poison. 

Nikolai understood, and he reached for her hand, feeling her fingers close around his as they looked back up the reddening sky. 

The truth hung heavily on his shoulders, now that he was already in way too deep with his feelings, but he shoved all the thoughts away. 

Right now, nothing had to be said. 


End file.
